bob

so bob's service was today. it was nice. his son and daughter got up and talked about him. and so did his son-in-law. they said that bob never really said that he loved them but that he knew that he did becasue he was always showing. genny, nancy, and jay were all there. before the service i saw mary in the breeze way. she was in a stream of tears. nad i can understand. her brother-in-law who always was there from them was gone. so i went up and hugged and talked to her for a bit until molly tried to corral everyone into the heratige room. so molly did herd the cats into the room. so the service goes and after it they have lunch down in the social hall. martha was greeting people as par for her. so was molly. i don't know if i missed the que to hug martha and in turn made her feel worse or if i give off the don't hug me vibe. i don't know. but other than mary none of the family hugged me. nor anyone else there. or am i expecting to much to give and receive hugs at a service? and i know that i should not make this about me. i know. it's just that i felt alone and not wanted. but i know that they cared becasue they asked how i was doing adn meant it. am i some how a part of the problem? and if so what is that problem so that i can fix it. or is it that i usually am up beat and going and going. so that it made them not able to deal with me? i don't know. bob will be missed.