still lacking on posts

so it's been a loooooong time since i last posted. many things have happened inbetween here and there. like halloween and thanksgiving. and many birthdays. so we start from where i left off. don't feel like running away anymore. i just need to get off my lazy butt and do what i needs to be done. and what needs to be done is that i need to get back into school and back on the track that i set two years ago. have figured out that kat and i will not be getting together. i know it in my brain just have to get it to my heart. i need to let go of my jealousy of others. and take control of my life and not mope around. been doing stuff with the youth group at church. love the kids. been working my ass off. and thinking about taking another job. but really thinking about quiting. and been broke. car got new tires and new radiator. after blowing up on me in the middle of the night while coming home. so much indebt to my parents. went to branson with laura, sharon, and chole. had a great time. saw titantic, silver dollar city. am happy that we are going to alabama for christmas. so lots of the same stuff and lots of nothing new. just a different month and getting colder.